Trouble, your name is Cat - astrophe

I live in a house with many pets. 17 in all. Some are furry, some are scaly, and some only last for a few hours (we call them, food). 

I already wrote about Roxie so it's time to give the other troublemaker her due. If Roxie is the Poodle Princess, then Catastrophe is the Tabby Queen. Where Roxie wins attention by being cute and fun, Catastrophe gets it by being annoying and a little bit crazy. She has not exactly won the hearts of the household (in fact, my husband uses an adjective for her that I can't use in this blog, generally between "stupid" and "cat").

I'm the only member of my household who is not allergic to cats. My youngest son has the worst reaction which sets off his asthma and makes it hard for him to breathe. Of course, he was the one who brought the cat home. Surprisingly, there was a girl involved (read heavy sarcasm). They were walking through a field and this little kitten started following them. When they reached the road, they were worried it would get hurt so they decided to take it home. To my house, because her father said no. We tried for two weeks to find a new home for the cat but no luck. Finally, Roxie and I convinced my hubby to keep the cat -- Roxie because she thought it was a fun, new toy, and me because I wanted a nice, furry pet that I could pet. Little did I know.

After a month of calling this new kitten "Cat" and "X@(*&!-ing Cat", she earned the name Catastrophe. She spent a lot of time clawing furniture, playing tag with the dog, digging in my plants (when she wasn't eating them and throwing up), trying to run out the door, and knocking things over. Christmas was a lot of fun when she climbed the tree to help us decorate (then she had a lot of fun un-decorating). One thing Catastrophe didn't seem to do was sleep. Now, if you've ever owned a cat, you know that they love to lounge. They'll find the most unusual places to roll up into a ball and purr themselves to sleep. Not this cat. And pet her? Not if you like to keep your skin intact!

Catastrophe is always hunting -- something. She found a mouse in the basement, located a missing snake, catches flies in mid-air and chases down (and eats) escaped crickets. Sometimes, she hunts humans -- she loves to stalk you from behind a wall or the top of the stairs. She and Roxie take turns chasing each other around the house. In fact, I finally figured out that Catastrophe has an identity crisis -- she doesn't know if she's a dog, a lizard or a human. The only thing she doesn't want to be, is a cat. She doesn't like to be picked up or petted unless it means she's getting fed. She has everyone in the house trained to feed her twice a day or she will destroy the carpets. 

Whenever we have visitors, we do a tour of the "zoo" and we ensure them that it's safe to handle all the pets  -- except the cute, cuddly looking one. Because, as you know, you are not allowed to touch "the Queen"!